“Hi! One of us peed on the couch while daddy wasn’t looking when putting away the fence, and then ran upstairs to try and poop in the guest bathroom, and trailed poop down the stairs as daddy took me outside. Can you guess which one?
Oh yeah, and daddy had just been outside with me for five minutes right before all of this went down. I thought it was a better idea to do this all inside. What do you think mommy?”